By Guest Columnists Sophia and Jared
To say moving across the pond was a difficult transition is an understatement to say the least; however, we hope our story will encourage others to be brave enough to take a risk and… ‘just give it two years’. This was the friendly advice given to us by fellow Brits in LA shortly after arriving and this was what we said to ourselves every time there was a bump in the road and there have been A LOT! (Seriously, we could write a book).
After a fabulous year travelling the world, we decided we needed permanent sunshine in our lives and as teachers, a better work/life balance. Having loved California as tourists, and with Jared’s passion for music production and DJing, we were delighted to be selected for interviews in LA and were subsequently offered positions at a school in Encino. Even though we were broke from travelling and our contracts didn’t include any subsidizing costs for moving to a new country, we jumped at the chance for this once-in a-lifetime opportunity. What’s the worst that could happen? Being only 27 at the time we figured if it all fails, we can just go home.
After being here for just over a year, encountering many hurdles along the way both personally and professionally we were doing it tough. Our relationship was strained, and we found ourselves questioning our decision to move over. I lost count of the amount of times I sat thinking, ‘I hate it here, I want to go home’. I had lived abroad twice before and never once felt homesick or unsettled, yet here, that’s all we felt. Living in LA was supposed to be fun and adventurous but instead it was expensive, stressful, complicated and caused nothing but anxiety. Soon most of the initial excitement of living in LA had worn off; family and friends came and left and life was dull. It revolved around work and nothing else which was hard for two ambitious, spontaneous adventurers. We carpooled together, worked together, had the same few work friends and hung out with them outside of work. It was then that we realized we were actually really quite lonely – we weren’t necessarily living; we were so unsettled that we were just existing and on top of that we began to miss the great British camaraderie. Jared being half American, was slightly more accustomed to American ways, but still struggled adapting culturally.
We wanted more and found ourselves searching for something comforting and familiar…new friends. That being said, we were at that awkward age where we had already made our life-long friends back home, we didn’t have children so we couldn’t meet or hang out with other parents and not only that, I don’t think we fully comprehended how culturally different a place that speaks the same language could be.
Finally, without wanting to throw everything away in such a short time we plucked up the courage to express how we felt on the Brits in LA Facebook page. We expressed how we missed having a revolving door, people just popping by for a cuppa, chilling at home in your pajamas with friends watching bad TV and most of all the banter. We were completely overwhelmed with the response and surprised to find out that many people were feeling the same, even those that had been in LA for many years. It really did give us some hope that we could make it work, because deep down we knew this was where we were supposed to be, and LA really is a great place once you settle in. The next step was to begin meeting up with some of the Brits and people of other nationalities that messaged us wanting to take us under their wing.
Moving forward another year, we have finally found that familiar comfort we were searching for and we are so much happier after having met so many amazing people and we have successfully made life-long friends. We have been to curry nights, BBQs, pool parties, nights out, Come Dine with Me style events, Thanksgiving dinners, Christmas ugly sweater parties, New Year celebrations and even had casual pop-ins, which wouldn’t have been possible without all of our fabulous fellow Brits. We have now developed a healthy balance between work and home life and have been able to really begin enjoying our new life here and not just see it as a short-term experience. LA is tough, people can be fickle and unreliable, but you really have to put yourself out there, meet people, explore and focus on your happiness. If you find yourself struggling or going through hard times, know that it is likely that someone else has been through or is experiencing the same thing as you, we’re here for you – be confident that you’ve made the right decision and… “just give it two years”!
